King Sol

 
Pompey celebrate Kanu’s first goal, in a 3-0 win over Blackburn.

So Chelsea won? Am I supposed to be amazed that they beat sad sleepy Man City 3-0? The British media is. Hell, even Mourinho is. Don’t forget that Terry and Lampard scored. Terry is England’s new skipper/Tony Adams so he gets a bye this week (not out of respect but to pace the ribbings). Lampard, son, scoring in the friendly against Greece and in the opener doesn’t make you the next Becks – although you’ll be resigned to his sad fate soon enough. Only in your case, it’ll be deserved.

Ronaldo and Rooney work together to mark a decisive Man U win. Team R/R (or Roonaldo). Think of the wine and cheese parties this couple will throw in their golden years. With Roons on suspension, he can start planning now.

Arsenal draws against Villa. A waste of 2 points, to be sure. It’s a strange and large new stadium, and I’ll allow midweek internationals and significant injury issues to scapegoat the matter (Terry got a bye this week too, remember?). That said, not resolving this silly Cole/Gallas saga, and not ridding the terrible cyst (also known as Reyes) isn’t doing anyone any favours. Arsene, woo the Chairman’s wife, and use your geniunely French charm to blackmail him into taking care of business. However, the future, Wolcott, earned the ball that Gilberto used to score. A well deserved assist in his first minutes in the premiership. The future is a promising future indeed.

Dark horse pick reaffirmed: Pompey might make believers of us all. This goalkeeper… James? What, used to play for England? Really, just a little a while ago? Huh. Who? Sol? Wasn’t he the rock of the England backline? No, not anymore? But he was incredible this weekend… Portsmouth’s rehabilitating former England Internationals – and in the process, reminding us that the premiership wasn’t always about revolving door teams with space program budgets (by the way, welcome to Chelsea, Boulahrouz. Please pick a number to await to be dressed and played, help yourself to the complimentary tea and Mourinho ego). Teams like Portsmouth, Aston Villa, Newcastle and Everton, with geniune dramas and sagas, compete for the titles and cups because they feel it’s the only resolution to their tribulations. In the end, you can’t help but admire the pride they exude on the pitch. Our hopes and dreams are with you.

Fuck Cole.

[MF]